I don’t remember my first physical examination or who the doctor was, but I remember why I hate getting fingered. 

I mean, how could I forget the two things I remember about the experience, namely:

1. Extreme embarrassment
2. Extreme discomfort

You know all about the ‘finger exam‘ if you’re a male over the age of forty-five. 

It’s a procedure where the doctor inserts his lubricated and gloved finger inside your rectum to check your prostate gland for signs of cancer.

Although this exam is embarrassing and uncomfortable, it is crucial to have this done each year.

Today, I have an appointment with my doctor for my annual physical exam. 

I’ve procrastinated for months because I hate the finger probe.

By the way, if you’re a regular reader, you already know a quote I often cite:

The opposite of Love is not Hate – it’s Fear. ~ Danny

However, the finger exam is something I both hate and fear!

Women are also subjected to embarrassing and uncomfortable physical exams, such as the ‘pap smear test‘ to detect cervical cancer or the ‘mammogram test‘ to detect breast cancer.  

And I imagine it’s more uncomfortable for women if the doctor doing the test(s) is a man.

While living in Moncton (1992-97), finding a doctor taking new patients was challenging. 

However, after a few months, I got a female family doctor. 

Her name was Dr. LeBlanc, one of my favorite doctors.

I remember my first physical exam with her. 

I was nervous because of the ‘finger’ test. 

There is also a procedure where the doctor touches men just below their ‘equipment’ and tells them to cough. 

When you cough, your ‘boys’ are supposed to jump—or that’s how I remember the test being explained to me.

So when Dr. LeBlanc was doing the prostate exam on me, she suddenly stopped and said she couldn’t complete the test because her finger was too short. 

She said that she would refer me to a urologist for the examination.

I knew the urologist would have long fingers, but when I arrived at his office and saw that he was almost seven feet tall, I started feeling squeamish. 

And when he introduced himself by reaching out his hand to shake mine, I almost fainted at the size of his hand (fingers)!

Naturally, the finger chosen would be the doctor’s longest one. 

I thought about requesting that he use his baby finger, but didn’t want to sound wimpy. 

I screamed in pain when he inserted his middle finger into me. 

It felt like his finger traveled up to my lungs!

That was more than twenty years ago. 

I’ve probably had a dozen of those tests since, but never with the same amount of pain. 

But explain that to my brain – I am still squeamish!

It’s currently 8:15 on Wednesday morning.  My appointment is for 11:00 am. 

Wish me well. But don’t wait to see any photos or videos.

By the way, I wrote this story to remind you to complete these tests.

It’s imperative to catch cancer in the early stage – prevention is much easier than the treatments – and I don’t want to hear about any more of my friends (especially you) getting this disease!

Too many tears have been shed – please get an appointment for a prostate exam, a pap smear, or a mammogram exam today!

Stay healthy by adopting a healthy lifestyle and getting annual checkups with your family doctor.

Take it from me: it’s easier than going through painful cancer treatments.

Never give up on your dreams!

Remember this:

Cancer isn’t a death sentence, but giving up on Life is! ~ Danny

Dedicated to Dr. Robin Wilson

I hope my stories are a gift to your head and heart.

Hugs,

Danny

Today’s tune from Danny’s library (purchased):

They say that you know when you know
So let’s face it, you had me at hello
Hesitation never helps
How could this be anything, anything else, when

All I dream of is your eyes, all I long for is your touch
And, darling, something tells me it’s enough, mm mm
You can say that I’m a fool and I don’t know very much
But I think they call this love

One smile, one kiss, two lonely hearts is all that I need now, baby
You’re on my mind every night, every day
Good vibrations getting loud
How could this be anything, anything else, when

All I dream of is your eyes, all I long for is your touch
And, darling, something tells me that’s enough, mm
You can say that I’m a fool and I don’t know very much
But I think they call this love
Oh, I think they call this love

What could this be
Between you and me? Oh..oh, oh

All I dream of is your eyes, all I long for is your touch
And, darling, something tells me, tells me it’s enough
You can say that I’m a fool and I don’t know very much
But I think they call, oh, I think they call
Yes, I think they call this love

This love.

Songwriters: Glen Joseph Roberts, Elliot James Reay & Annielle Lisiuk

Here are other songs I’m listening to: These Songs Will Make You Smile Today.